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one moms crusade against all things mommy
Browsing All Posts published on »May, 2013«
Blue Bags
Ladies and gentleman – we went to Ikea. Is there no greater hell on earth than the Saturday Ikea crowd? The answer simply… No. The reason for going – we needed an umbrella. The reason we need an umbrella – Is scary. We live in an apartment on a high floor and are lucky enough […]
Baby Tires
May 24, 2013
Our little man Jolly Green (Giant) has bypassed his original nickname. He now can only be referred to as the Hulk. Not only because he favors green veggies over the orange ones, but because he’s no longer Jolly Huge…he’s incredibly huge. The Incredible Hulk he is. The realization came when changing him this morning…as his […]
Happy Moms Day
May 12, 2013
My first mothers day – could it be? I’m a mom? No shit, that’s me. Somedays I still can’t believe that I’m a mom… That I actually gave birth to a spawn. How I now can’t remember life before him, the days of partying until dawn on a whim. Unmentionable things used to give me […]
Addicted to Cup Holders
May 11, 2013
I’ll admit it. I’m addicted to cup holders. I bitch obsessively when the zip car we rent dosent have adequate cup holding capabilities. I’ve been known to complain while in others people’s car when there isn’t an accessible holder. Ive even asked the stewardess why there arent cup holders on airplanes. Quite simply – I […]
I Hate Teeth
May 5, 2013
I have bad teeth. Actually, bad is an understatement. I have horrifically horrible are-you-sure-your-not-a-drug-addict teeth. I have had countless cavities, abscesses, and root-canals. I’ve chipped, broken and cracked many. I’ve had or have braces, retainers and bridges. I have more porcelain in my mouth than you grandma has in her cabinet, minus the floral pattern. I know more […]
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May 28, 2013
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