Browsing All Posts published on »January, 2013«

Rolling with my Hommies

January 29, 2013

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A milestone in our Circus world today! Lil Johnny rolled today. No, Not a joint silly! He rolled over! Yep. Back to Belly and then cried and flailed like a flipped turtle because he couldn’t get back. Its happening folks. Pretty soon Lil Johnny will be mobile! I look around the apartment. Oh my god. […]

Hair Loss – Week 5

January 29, 2013

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Oh, the hair loss continues…! Its sad and disheartening and I need to add more hats to my rotation damn it. My poor husband deserves a trophy for dealing with my freakouts each morning with the blow dryer. I don’t care if I lose all but three hairs on the top of my head and […]

The Trifecta

January 28, 2013

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A big weekend at the circus. Little man moved to size 3 diapers, rolled over, and cut his first tooth. A trifecta of firsts. Trifecta. Wow, i miss our degenerate gambling. My husband and I used to sneak off to Vegas or its red headed step sis AC at least every few months. I’ll say […]

Spoon Me

January 27, 2013

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Got tooth? To me if ya got a tooth – ya can eat off a spoon. With the new found tooth, I run up to Babies R Us and buy a pack of infant spoons. I also buy a selection of 69 cent organic baby foods to put on said spoon. Let’s see how he […]

Flashlight

January 27, 2013

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Another day another teething fit. Its serious now. Today I get out the flashlight. There has to be something back there? I wash my hands profusely and dig in. Flashlight in mouth I feel like I am mining for gold or the next star in the Indiana Jones trilogy when I see it. Low and […]

Size 3 Diapers

January 23, 2013

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We ordered the next size up diapers for Lil Johnny online – and received them today. Oh my god. The box is huge and overtakes half of our 700sq feet apartment living space.Awesome. I look closely at the box. The box has a picture of a baby sitting up without support, smiling, with teeth. I […]

Hair Loss – Week 4

January 21, 2013

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Today I went to go see my dermatologist, who is at least 10 years my junior and has a bad case of short man’s disease, about my hair. He had me repeat, out loud, no less than 25 times, “I will not go bald.” This is his treatment plan. Awesome. Easy for you to say […]

You know your life has officially become a circus when…

January 18, 2013

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Your morning routine involves you – sitting on the floor – pumping with your hands free cone bra, Shaking a rattle and playing with baby with one hand (that’s also alternating petting the over jealous dog) while eating egg white sandwich with the other picking off pieces off toast and giving it to the dog, […]

Tastemaker

January 17, 2013

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Ped (and Dr. Google) said it was time. Time for tastes with little Johnny. Start to get him excited about food. We figure today’s a good day. We actually have food in the apartment – and when I say we have food I mean 1 banana – and I read that kids like bananas, so […]

Hair Loss – Week 3

January 16, 2013

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What the fuck is happening to my hair? A little after Johnny’s 3 month birthday my hair started falling out. I remember it exactly because it was on New Year’s Eve Day when the loss was noticeably more. Happy hair loss! I screamed on New Year’s Eve. And my hair is not just falling out […]